A stroll into the past!
My eyes were filled with tears, and my heart heavy with grief!
And that's when my mind revisited the past and burdened my heart with even more anguish!
Reminiscing the old times always brought back bitter memories!
The painful regrets,
/ the unfulfilled dreams,
/ the unsaid words,
/ the unexplained actions,
/ the unjustified decisions,
/ the pending commitments,
/ the unresolved trauma,
/ the open wounds,
/ the unhealed scars,and a lot more - was tearing my heart apart!
Living in the present with old memories is like scratching your wounds each day!
Because after all, memories are a gift as well as a curse.
The mere thought of all those days and nights and moments,
/ when I cried my heart out,
/ when my pillow was wet with tears,
/ when I bit my own lip to hold back tears,
/ when I slept empty stomach,
/ when I begged God to listen to my prayers,
/ when I sat alone in the dark,
/ when I cried myself to sleep,still well up my eyes and distress my heart!
I had paid a price - of having my own set of likes and dislikes, my own dreams and aspirations, my own choices and plans!
I sometimes wonder -
If you've wanted to pursue a goal ambitiously, how easy is it to let it slip from your hold?
If you've wanted something dearly, how easy is it to settle with something else?
If you've loved a person passionately, how easy is it to let them find their own nest?
Though my parents had taught me ambition,
I wasn't taught that - all that would happen in the end would be God's will!
Though my family taught me to be emotional and sensitive to other's sentiments,
I wasn't aware that 'my' feelings would go unheard and uncared for!
Though my mentors taught me to be persistent for what I wanted,
I wasn't taught that sometimes, the best thing, is to let go!
Maybe,
That’s how life is!
It teaches you the easiest lessons with the toughest examples!
It drives you crazy after dreams that weren't meant to be in your cap!
It lets you fall for people who weren't supposed to be your constants!
It lets you chase mirages!
But at the same time, it lets you find solace even amidst chaos!
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